Ep. 130 – The Gravedigging Gentleman

You’ll die trying contain sensitive subject matter and conversation surrounding death and dying and may not be suitable for all audiences. Listener discretion is respectfully advised.

Oh, a Trier’s, it’s me, Nathan. In studio but not on camera. I’m heavy. I’m heavy hearted. Because of that I do not want to be seen. Only heard. And that’s okay. Because I made a promise to you. And I hope that you have reciprocated said promise. And it’s just to simply meet me where I am because that’s what I’m doing with you. I was traveling around to a couple of the locations and I spoke to a very steady director. And when I say steadied, you know that person who never wavers sound waves. For instance, when they are seeing an images, they are bouncing up and down, like this, like my voice is doing right now. This individual is constant, never too high, or over emotional, never too low. And down in the dumps. We were sitting across from one another, this individual is older than myself and I seek much wisdom from them. They are the calm amongst chaos. They truly are. And they looked at me and I told them, I hear you, I am waiting for this car crash. This spinning car to stop flipping so that I can make sure that everyone occupying the vehicle is okay. And that metaphors for what we’ve experienced for the last few years in this profession. They understood and they said to me, I’m just tired. I’m tired to have to speak about death all the time. I’m tired of people whom I care about and respect. I’m tired of them losing people. I need a break. If only right if only deaths are going to continue. Now, new reports are showing that instead of COVID being now on the tail end of this pandemic, now it’s supposedly the baby boomers, which arguably will last for the next 15 to 20 years. And if that is the case, then ladies and gentlemen who are in this profession with me, who I serve alongside. Hold tight. I’m heavy. I am here. Come as you are burden and all. And we will gather and we will acknowledge and also be hopeful for positive tomorrow. Be sure to visit Youâ€TMll hit the shop. Grab some swag grab a bag of what big turkeyfoot coffee that brown delicious juice. That hot, hot coffee. It’s amazing. Please grab some tulip Gear A lot of you over here from Tik Tok welcome or should I say ticky tock you Trier’s. I’m so excited to have you there is at this point in time an exclusive a very small limited run of a gentleman’s closure records those are actual physical things that you hold no longer than digital. Go over to your electronic comm forward slash shop click on the tick tock exclusive c d and y d t. E See what I did there? Of course, big turkeyfoot coffee and also our friends over at E F F express a funeral of funding. Well, here we are at episode 130 of season two 130 of the season to a show which has always been devoted to pulling back the curtain like I’m doing now to tell you You this director is tired and sad, taking down these walls brick by brick to expose the fact that my heart is burdened, and to let you see the hearts to my heart behind these walls that are caring for those you love most. Hold on tight, we’re going to dig a grave. There’s something haunting about not knowing exactly where the cemetery is located. I mean, not only the cemetery itself, the loved one you are precessing to the cemetery, their space itself.

You’d be surprised how many of the cemeteries do not pop up on Waze, Google Maps, Apple, whatever other map you use. Do you remember when you’d print directions onto papers from Mapquest and then you’d follow the turn by turns? And of course, they’re navigated by a co pilot this I can remember this vividly and the papers are crinkling No, I made the wrong turn. Kids, you have no idea. The troubles that we experienced now won’t even begin to mention an atlas. Huge Christopher Columbus map just spread across the windshield as you drive to Florida mom and dad are screaming at each other because of course, you’re almost at a gas and where’s the gas station? Could you imagine anyway? Nonetheless, you hope to have some general idea of the whereabouts of this cemetery this majestic, non existent but supposedly existent space? Not every community has a and I quote, Tom. Now, Tom, this is a real human, not a character has been digging graves longer than how old most of you are. The man first climbed a backhoe at the age of five. Maybe not, but I picture that and I was thinking to absolutely elaborate but I decided to stop with the big fish. Anyway, maybe not. Maybe not. Also, Tom is quick to fix his hair. This fingers through the front and swooping back when the pretty lady funeral directors pull up and is kind enough to button his shirt when they are present. A true gentleman jokes aside. You can just absolutely count on him to have his shirt off until the 11th hour without question. I’m still on the shirt. I’m getting off topic. I’m sorry. Tom knows where every cemetery within a 100 mile radius is and I am not kidding, I guarantee it. I would legitimately put my money on it. Which is comforting. When in doubt, call the Grave Digger. Tom, the unsung hero. Really, though all the Tom’s of the world are the ladies and gentlemen, you as families who have been served have never really heard from you rarely see are the ones who hide behind the bushes or behind the trees who pivot last minute to make it happen for you. Really, you and this will be another episode in the future. But this is the family who comes in to make arrangements on a Sunday morning, who you have the hardest time getting hold of pastors and priests and churches and cemeteries and all of those things to carry out a Monday morning visitation followed by a late morning early afternoon service and then burial it is nearly impossible and yet somehow in some way all of the stars aligned because of your hero, the grave dhikr. Now they have named Monster Trucks after them. They have named wrestlers. Well they named the wrestlers after Undertaker’s but you get the idea. They are the people behind the outdoors curtain. It is Jeff. It is kin it is Brian and Jonathan and all of these people who work tirelessly logistics out the wazoo. You’d be amazed at how much goes into getting involved in getting the trucks and getting the trailer and getting the excavator and getting all the dirt moved. Just so that when you pull up in the procession, which is led by the funeral director who Hopefully I can trust you, but all they can, because you are the Grave Digger. And they called you and you said yes sir or Yes ma’am.

This episode is solely devoted to the kins and Jeff’s and Brian’s and Jonathan’s of the world who devote their lives to saying yes, I have never been told no. And it is not because I am the boss. It is not because oh Nathan is asking it is literally because that is their hearts. Much like on tic tock, when people want to throw dirt. To some of the videos we post, my simple reply is, I hope you realize that I have devoted my entire life to you and yours. How incredibly powerful to know that our grave diggers have devoted their entire lives to you and yours. And me. Never once when I pick up the phone to call, do they not answer never wants? Do they not fulfill a request? On time? Never once and my left wondering how in the hell am I getting to the cemetery? Which entrance do I take? Which way do I go so that all of those who are in the procession do not have to park on a busy and dangerous street? Which way do I go? So the little old lady six cars behind in a walker doesn’t have to walk down that hill? Which by the way, should she have to I assure you, Kin Jeff, Brian would be there first, on either side of her arms to make sure that she is safe. And although there’s only eight chairs, usually, magically, somehow, there’s always more than enough for the feeble old man who needs a break. I didn’t do it. Ken did hauling flowers from the funeral home or the church to the cemetery. Magically,

they are empty from the vehicle long before we even can say hey, I have flowers. The greens that you see covering the grave of the one you love freshly sweeped. Yes, they did that they did not do that with a vacuum either. It’s by hand, dirtying there’s so that you have a clean space to walk. Many times torrential downpours occur yet they stand at attention. Soaked, never heard. Because Lord knows all of you are going to want to hang at the cemetery long after the committal service completes. Because for some odd reason, cemeteries are the places where we hang out the longest it is the most absurd thing I’ve ever seen in my life. I don’t I don’t know. I will never rush you. I don’t understand it. I think it’s very interesting. And it’s not because you’re wanting to smoke a cigarette. The amount of teamwork that goes into a funeral. The funeral directors yes are heroes. The grave diggers are the unsung. They are the men and women who work seven days a week. Literally, there is no rotation. And a moment’s notice they will tie down their excavator load another vault, drive an hour to cemetery to make certain that they complete the task for you. And boy, do they so as I complete this episode, I’m not so sad anymore. Because I know that there are kins and Jeff’s and Brian’s and Jonathan’s and people who really, really care about me and you and the tasks that we have to complete for you. And never will they waver the Greens will stay clean, the mud will be removed, the dirt piles will be beautifully placed. little old ladies will be escorted to and from their vehicles. And we will never have to waver or wonder where we are going. Because they know where we are going and they know the way and there is something biblical about that. So I tip my hat to my friends who I know I can trust who I know will never steer me in the wrong direction and who I know will be standing at attention, day or night or rain or shine. The moment that my procession enters into their space because they care. This episode is fully dedicated to you. Our cemetery care team, especially had Swan or Swan su a n, which is Gaelic as an Irishman, Catholic eternal slumber, eternal rest grant done to them a Lord and may perpetual light shine upon them. And not just the loved one in which we are laying to rest into this hollow grave, but the individuals who dug it may you in a very special way all of you cemetery caretakers, experience joy and peace and comfort and knowing that what you do truly matters because a space forever marked space honoring the life the legacy of someone you love has been tended to and cared for meticulously by these people. Be sure to follow me on Instagram at Nathan Morris at your bedtime podcast or on ticky tock at Nathan Morris music. Head over to the store. You’ll die forward slash shop a lot of you have been asking about where to get those two lip tees they are there and they are there are plenty. When the Tick Tock exclusive offer is gone it is gone working on a new record. It’s going to be bananas. You can find me on a hill with a beautiful spring breeze. Standing at attention while the grave is beautifully covered by our cemetery care team. And I will see you at episode 131 You are honored and loved