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Ep 27 – Moral Compass

Welcome back. This is

sorry. No,

no, please. You while were you just doing like spirit fingers,

saying we’re recording and I was trying to be quiet because I like how you introduce everything and everyone and then I interrupted you.

I think this is episode 27 You would no 27 Have we should do that we should have an n number. Like how many there that’s an end date. I don’t want to wall no walls that’s reference to previous podcasts.

See, I was paying attention to you.

What about those people who do listen, by the way thank you for listening. We absolutely love it and appreciate it and respect you for it so very much what about those people who listen to it asynchronously? Like maybe they just see a title and they’re like, well I’m gonna listen to it because I do that without it at all costs. Yeah, I haven’t gone back to the My favorite podcast of the very beginning and listen straight on I had never drive me crazy. So for those of you who are just popping in this is maybe Episode One could be Episode Five. It really doesn’t matter what there’s no there’s no boundary. Well, if

they were just popping in they’ve already fallen off because I’m rude and disrespectful. I interrupt.

People love your self deprecating humor. Yes. Hi, everyone. Welcome to this episode of you’ll die trying. So depressing. A special thank you to someone who makes what could be a depressing situation less depressing. And Nathan, I’d like to hear you say a little bit about our friend and our podcast sponsor, Robert edge of Kentucky Farm Bureau.

You know those people in your life that you want to surround yourself with people who are better than you and you want in your company because you want you know good people in your company. You are like the company you keep this is that gentleman Robert edge was in Kentucky Farm Bureau. Insurance is a protector of those and those things that I love home auto life, he is there for me and my family. With life insurance. For instance, we just had our new baby, consider life insurance. If you’re considering the life insurance, please be sure to give Robert edge a call. He is the man that you need to have take care of your family. You can reach him by

calling 270-929-4215 or emailing robert.edge@kyfb.com.

He is an agent he’s big on commitment. I can vouch for him. I can vouch for Robert. Robert, thank you. Thank you, Robert. Driving Muay Thai is a mind. We’re talking about today,

I want to say thank you, first of all, for all of our sponsors. And thank you for all to all of our listeners. And as a special thank you to our listeners. I’d like to offer a wonderful podcast today. Yes, absolutely.

I think it’s really endearing that you think of our listeners, every episode is kind of cool. It’s really cool. Because we are grateful for it. And I think you can lose touch of that, you know, we are growing exceptionally well. If I might add, I can’t get over it. It’s nuts. And it’s still fun for us. And I have to remind myself, you know, like, I want to keep it fun. I don’t want it to ever feel like a job. Although it is to the point where it’s becoming a job, but not a bad sense. It’s fun. Yeah, it’s fun to work anyway, I think it’s great that you continuously. Thank people. So that’s awesome that you’re doing that. So what are we talking about today?

Well, I’d like to talk about helping people understand in by people, I mean me, because if we haven’t figured it out yet, most of this stuff that we talked about is stuff that we both know that we ourselves either want to work on need to work on, or have thought about one day maybe beginning to start thinking about working on. And today I wanted to talk a little bit about core principles. Okay, those values and beliefs that guide our lives. Like a star for a ship. If you don’t have GPS and you’re in the 1300s

He is pointing to the sky. So dramatically star and then he slowly lowers his hand. A ship. His eyes are shut. They are that was real. I was in it. That was magical. I like that I think we should have recorded that filmed it.

Speaking of which, at the beginning of the year, we are going to be having video podcasting that will probably

just totally demolished this

podcast. Pretty sure that’s the end of us. This is episode one of one of the video podcasts you’ll know it’s the same format for you who are listening on your various planet forums, Google Play Apple iTunes, by the way, we have Apple music as a family now, unbelievable by now. All right. So wherever you get your content, this is going to stay the same for you. However, if you are lying awake and you have your phone, tablet or laptop in bed and you’re trying to go to sleep, you’ll be able to go on to YouTube, and watch our podcast where they will be filmed. for your viewing pleasure. Yep. Sorry. So I wanted to talk about the how the fact that your internet, our internet, where we are right now is down. And also, I want to talk about

man’s up sorry,

creating principles or understanding what our principles are.

Go ahead. You first. I don’t even know what you’re talking about. What

are your guiding principles?

What I mean, like, your core beliefs, your core principles, I believe that every person is deserving to be loved and cared for. Therefore, I do my best to do that. Okay, that’s a guiding principle in my life. Okay. Okay. All right. That’s one that I can think of. Oh, maybe we should alternate. Okay, yeah, you go now. I’ll just start making stuff up that I think

so. My, a similar one for me is that every human being has inherent value worth and dignity and should be treated as such. Yeah, so it’s pretty similar to yours.

I was gonna copy off you again. But then I just, we spent this entire podcast just passing the same thing back.

Okay. So I’ll go second, so that you sat down, not always stealing from you, which is what I always do. No, you don’t know. I didn’t mean that. Basically, I read your journal. And that’s what gives me the content for our podcasts weren’t for you. We would just be sitting in silence. So our second one is, I think you should always, always be yourself. Be yourself. Someone once said, because everyone else has already taken. I’d much rather be a first rate version of me than a second rate version of someone else. That’s what Judy Garland said. Judy Garland, who played Dorothy, who has Liza Minnelli’s mother, that was mind blown when I found that out. Yeah. Oh, now your mind blown. Yes, Judy Garland fake news, Liza Minnelli’s mother. That’s insane. Okay, yourself. You’re you’re you’re waiting on your number two to come. Yeah.

Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. That’s mine.

All right, your turn for number three. Okay.

I think that another driving value, core value, principle thing, something delay. Hold for?

What’s happening?

You know how people say? Have you ever been in a conversation where people are noticeably delaying the inevitable or pushing it further so they can think of something?

Pretty sure I’m in that situation?

You are totally in that situation? I don’t know. I’m drawing blanks. I just think you know. I don’t know.

I have one I have. So the first one was that human beings are inherently worthy and have dignity and value on their own right. Second one was Be yourself. Third one for me is you cannot change anyone except for yourself.

Yeah, that’s it. That is a good one. I think was that your third one? No, it wasn’t my third one. But to add to that, I think it is good to expect nothing from other one. Anyone and you will not be disappointed. I think a friend of mine named Dr. Carroll told me that no expect now can one. Expect nothing from someone and you will not be disappointed? Yeah,

yeah. Okay, I’ve got one. Okay. And, um, this one is not original to me. And neither is the one after that. Or the one after that. You really

have that many more in your head. Oh, yeah. What’s wrong with me today? Well, it’s just probably

because of the nature of what I do. This is a part of the conversations I have with people on a daily basis.

You said that literally you have an excuse that you have made for me like seven podcasts? Well,

the people you talk to don’t talk back often that that but what yeah, you’re right. So one is, you know, the golden rule. And I just wrote a column about this actually, for our local paper messenger inquirer.com. You can look me up but then they make you pay. If you want to read it, let me know I’ll send you my password. But you can expect every religious tradition to abide by the golden rule. Now the golden rule

is, is this love your neighbor as yourself? Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you.

There it is. There it is. There it is. The first one you said was the greatest command greatest commandment, love God and then love your neighbor. yourself. The second one that you said yes, that’s the Golden Rule Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you. So my value is that plus the Silver Rule. Okay, silver rule is don’t do for others what they should do for themselves.

I love that. That is so awesome. Can I ask? I want to add to that, because it just made me think, on my mini feed on Facebook, which Facebook can be a rabbit hole of just stupidity. There was this guy asking for an olive branch. Okay, he and his wife and their child are behind on rent. Is this someone you know? No, he, I don’t know how we’re friends on Facebook. So if you have to go Bob, we’re friends on Facebook. And yes, I know him. Supposedly. He is behind on rent, and they are going to be evicted. So they have this go fund me going. And I think what I’m getting at is you said don’t do unto others what they can do for themselves. Some people just need a hand. Right? Mm, yeah. Now you can also become enabling? Yes, yes,

thank you. There’s a big difference between being an empower and being an enabler. Enabling tends to not only try to assist others, but it ends up assisting us like it develops this kind of codependency, where I’m going to make sure you have everything you need, so that you can stay like you are so that I can continue to care for your needs. So you need and I need to be needed. And that’s kind of a thing that happens a lot, a lot. So in other words, don’t pay their rent. Well, I think it’s absolutely essential that we all act with charity. Yeah, with graciousness, with a heart of service to be of support, and to lift up those who are downtrodden. Absolutely. If it however, is your sixth time doing it. Got it. You might want to ask yourself, what is the nature of this relationship? Yeah. And of course, you know, people do take advantage of us all the

time, unintentionally, more times than not to, by the way. Yeah.

Or what’s another principle for you? Just stop? Oh, let me think about mine. See, I have one that’s related to our podcast. Okay. I don’t think failure is the opposite of success. I think it’s a necessary part of it. Yeah.

Do you think any of our podcasts or any of our episodes have been failures? Yeah, me too.

This is Episode What? 20? I don’t know your number man. No. 27,027. And I think 26 of them have been failures. I won’t say which 20. Right. But yeah, absolutely. Oh, I don’t know. I mean, we say that. But there might be one thing that somebody got out of a particular podcast. And, you know, I’ll say this. And this goes back to a conversation that we had about print lane. If we are doing our thing, and we’re being authentic then that No, I don’t think there any of them is a failure

to share, to show.

I think failure and success are dancing partners in the same way that I think faith and doubt are

so eloquent. I don’t

think that faith and doubt are opposites. I think faith needs doubt. One author I like to read says that doubt is the ants in the pants of faith keeps it alive and moving. Ants in

the pants of faith. We just think write all this stuff down for me even though authors I know how but just like take all of your bits that you’ve

kind of have thought about are doing that writing a book of like a book of books.

Yeah, that’d be awesome. Just like your know your favorite nuggets from all these books that you’ve read? Cuz I mean, you were constantly talking about things and you’re throwing these awesome nuggets out I should write a nugget tog Rafi nugget tog Rafi Yeah, it’s like photography with nuggets in the photographs. Yeah. Sorry. I’m sleep deprived.

You have dead brain.

You should have heard me in the hospital. I literally was staring at the clock and it had in the hands you know? Yeah, it wasn’t a digital clock. In other words,

I was gonna say old clock stuff that

yeah, I was just staring at it and the nurses in there and she’s talking and I said What time is that? What What time is on the wall? It was like for something in the morning and she was like, oh gosh, poor guy.

Is that when you got there at midnight?

We got it. No, this was the second night. Yeah, we had he was born Yeah, we had a three day it was their self my friend and her. His wife. She had a 40 hour labor 44 Zero not 14 Not for bless her heart and to all of you mothers out there who are out there. You know having babies and you You are the hero here and now I’m asking I’m going to say something I just want to make sure I preface it and saying that because when I’m getting ready to say I don’t want to sound like it was about me but they cater to the woman. Obviously they need to because the woman who literally just had a baby and mother baby unit. They need to have comfortable bed they need to be tended to nonstop as the baby Well, the dad and or significant other is totally really forgotten about? We lay on this. It’s like a picnic table top with with a with a sheet on it. Okay, that’s what we sleep on. And if it folds out into the bedroom into the room, so as to be in everyone’s way all the time. So you feel like you’re an inconvenience. Does that make sense? Yes. So it’s your you’re constantly uncomfortable and constantly feeling as if you’re inconveniencing people. That’s what I felt like. But it’s okay. It was about pega.

Yeah, I mean, I, I have this kind of old fashioned way of thinking that, you know, childbirth is really about the mom and the baby. That’s sort

of That’s what I said. Yeah. I don’t want to get scolded or stoned for that. I totally was okay with it. Really.

We’re not going to get a million comments saying, Oh, we’re not insensitive. Oh,

because that was all about it. And if you saw, I mean, my pictures. Oh, is delivered. Yeah. If you saw my pictures and so forth on social media, please be sure to visit us@facebook.com Not what facebook.com forward slash you’ll die trying and you can see some awesome photos. But no, it was a great, great experience. Where was that going with?

I want you to tell us a little bit about how you came up with the names of your children.

Okay, Franklin Anderson, granddad, who is no longer with us as 2013 when granddad passed away, we were expecting Anderson, granddad and myself have an incredible relationship. He has eight children, a couple of his children live out of state. And there he said eight children already. It was myself and my Uncle David. He really felt comfortable with us and granddad. Especially when he got sick. We’re already we’re close, really bonded. And I got to tell him, suggested found out as a boy, and were able to say granddad renaming our son after you Franklin was his it was going to be his name. Well, Megan and I were in 2000. This is real 12 went to Louisville to cochairs or I think it was go stairs to pick up a loved one who passed away. Oh, guess what the security guards name was Anderson.

She didn’t give me just for fairness. She didn’t give me time to guess. And I was gonna guess Anders. Okay. Well, his name was the waves means son of man. Really? Yeah. Well, he

was a cute little 70 something year old man. And Megan said, I love that name. Come to find out Anderson’s a family name on her side. Franklin Anderson. We call it Anderson ever it ever is just a really cool name. It’s an old name. Yeah, it’s just it’s very

just, I think it means Brave is a wild boar. Did you Google that? No. Okay. I have another person in my life who has a child named Everett. And it’s from an old English name. Well, I love his every wild like a boy.

Yes. He’s awesome. And his middle name is Michael after his grandfather, David, Michael Everly. And then navy. Let’s just you know, when you run out of things, that names that you think are cool. You just open the Crayola box, and you start naming them

on the ground and then yeah, whichever one you walk on, it hurts the most.

Yeah, no navy has a cool. It’s just cool. I mean, think about it united. I don’t think I thought of United States Navy of our armed forces. I think of

look, if I’d had a boy, it was going to be named Coast Guard. So I totally get it.

Well, no, it’s it’s it just says I like the name. Navy, the least

appreciated branch of the of the United States Armed Services and

you’re in you’re out the Coast Guard. Yeah. Well, Scotland is Scott Lin. We’re gonna name him or her Navy, Scotland. Regardless, Scotland, not Scotland. Got Lynn. Yes. Yeah. One tea. And I just got a text ironically enough that said congratulations to you. And Megan on the birth of Navy, Scotland. Oh, yeah. That will happen. He says on the rival of Navy, Scotland. Well, don’t

worry, because Scotland is an amazing country. Yeah,

well, I’ve never been I think you should go. So those are the those are the names and the reasoning behind them. Got me a long time to get on board with Navy.

I love I think the name is very cool.

I think it’s neat. Yeah. I mean, you can literally name your kid anything.

Like the two twins whose mom loved. loved that. Wonderful, flavorful, low calorie, gelatinous desert. She named her twins, lemon jello, and Iran jello. For lemon jello and orange jam. No way. Now that’s not true. It’s an urban legend.

My friend had taught kindergarten and she had she was given row roll call for the first time I think it was kindergarten or first grade. True story though. However, she was saying La La La dash a la Dasha.

That’s cool. Creative. Yeah, that’s tough for a kid. Yeah. I’ve always said that. I wouldn’t have a child that I would call by his or her middle name. And and we do we do have a child. Okay. Yeah, that’s what it is. Okay, so, speaking of being able to do anything you want to do when The things you can do, that you don’t have to have help doing is to create your own life principles. And that’s something we were talking about a minute ago.

Oh, yeah. Before we got off topic, which that’s my fault. No, no, no, no.

I just got word that a part has shipped. And that’s it’s exciting. It’s time to replace the water filter in our refrigerator. And I ordered it last night and it’s already been shipped. I

need to find out how to do that because mine’s been needing replacement for a while

have the light the the indicator light on what kind of refrigerator is it? Can you wish for it? Since they’re not sponsoring? Is it Frigidaire? Yes. Is it go to appliance parts? Pros? Yes, that’s it. And I type in the model number. Yes.

But I don’t know the model number. I’m not so have a water filter, but it’s not okay.

I mean, you’re not gonna do it. Now. I want to because we’re talking about it. How many? How many things have you ordered from Amazon while we were podcasting?

I have done not one I have. But God,

I ordered a book. Oh, I never did. Forgiveness, forgiveness. I want to say a word about this. This is I think one of the most important core values for us. And and I want to say a word about about Hamilton, the play that you cried about? Yeah, because we were talking about it once Off mic. And I wanted to tell you that if you have you heard the soundtrack by Lin Manuel Miranda, who wrote a lot of them a wanna soundtrack and he’s actually in the new Mary Poppins that’s coming, but he created Hamilton on the basis that he wanted to write a hip hop musical for Broadway, about an American founding father. I mean, talk about goals, right? That’s ridiculously awesome. So he did. And oh, no, I’m

sorry. I’m Are you?

Are you going to appliance parts pros right now?

No, I’m not. I’m looking at our podcast, right. The second so

he wrote and created and starred in Hamilton. That’s okay, go ahead.

Plants, parks pro.com.

And it’s, of course, a store about Alexander Hamilton. I think he was from Scotland, he ends up like in Jamaica. And then his mom may have adoptive mom dies and in his community recognizes that he’s brilliant. He’s writing like a local paper as a teenager, and they rally around them to find money to send them to this new, you know, new country, United States, not the United States at that point. So Hamilton comes in like 19 years old, he’s already like working in government circles. And he ends up you know, marrying and marries a sister really loves the other sister ends up having an affair because he’s away from home. And he, he becomes weak and loses his principal and is vulnerable and it’s terribly sad story loses a son. I would say this is a spoiler alert, but it’s about Alexander Hamilton. Right. You know, he’s, it’s his public domain, right. So, anyway, there’s this wonderful section, wonderful song called it’s quiet uptown. And in the remixed version of the soundtrack. I think Kelly Clarkson sings it, but the original is really wonderful. Lin Manuel Miranda Sings, as if, of course it the character, Alexander Hamilton is walking downtown and he’s, he’s uptown now they’ve moved, it’s quiet or they’re downtown, all the hustle and bustle they moved uptown. And he talks about walking back and forth walks the length of the city takes the kids to church makes the sound of the cross praise. He never used to do that before his son died, had this affair his wife has left him. And at the end of the song where What started with there is a grief too terrible to name. Having lost a child ends with there is a grace to terrible to name. And Eliza, the wife appears in the song on stage beside him. And she sings it’s quiet uptown. And then the chorus sings behind them. Forgiveness. Can you imagine? And in that moment, Eliza forgives her husband of his misdeeds and forgives him in his role in their son’s death and agrees at that time to live their life together. So where she had every reason to distance herself from him, she forgives him lets go of the past and moves into the future. I cry every time I hear that sound. And I’ll say it a lot and not because I want to be sad. But because I want to I want to know what that’s like to to realize that as somebody once said you when you forgive you let go you break the chain of what held you back you set a prisoner free and you figure out that the prisoners you

and we talked about this previously and that forgiving is not for them. It is for us it’s it’s at the very end. So that is a deep rooted principle. You know, putting me on the spot Jokes aside, I can’t pop them out. However, it is one that I take very seriously in that I try I want so badly to forgive those who have wronged me and ask for forgiveness for those I have. Definitely wronged that’s awesome. He is brilliant. I’m actually really excited to see the Mary Poppins movie.

Yeah, is it like going to be alive? Yeah, yeah, it’s gonna probably why it’s a it’s a musical a huge fan of Mary Poppins one I don’t know. What can I say? Why do I like chocolate? More than vanilla? I don’t know. I just do

I’m just surprised that you’re not like first in line to be quite honest with you. Well, our girls I mean that

Yeah, well, you know, I’ll watch it because well Miranda, but I’m not like you know what I’m super excited about is the remake of The Lion King. Yes. Holy cow. Yes. coming out next year. You know that couple of other Yes. No, no, go ahead. I just wanted to ask if you had any more ideas about some core values that drive you that keep you grounded moral compass has you know when you look at a compass with a little markers, and what keeps you on your northern bearing? That’s what I mean by principles. family first. Good. I buy in

family first. It is the first thing it is the last thing it should when I say only thing I mean that is on the top of the list, because when you are dying on your deathbed, whose hand will you be holding?

I pray to God as my wife’s right? And my children right?

That’s my point. God forbid, that’s not the case. Hopefully you will be able to be a source for that person or have something yet but that’s who’s going to be with you and all this other stuff fades you know, fame, notoriety, it literally does go away. Let’s be very honest. I mean, your back catalogue, if you’re the Eagles is forever. You know, the back catalogue of our awesome podcast isn’t forever, but my point is, is down the road. You know, when we’re 90 years old, and we choke on our dentures? People aren’t gonna want to hear that. Yeah. So But Megan will joy will and those that love us and we love will if we’ve loved them. Right. Right. Anyway, that’s my, I’ll end on that. Because other than that, I’ve already made a you know, a bit of myself.

You know what, you can relinquish that letting go? That’s a huge a huge principle for me. And another one is laughter. We do that a lot. Yeah, we do. Yeah. Another one for me is have no envy and have Are you just reading these because you’re coming up with these really fast? No, I there’s a song by Joshua Raiden, who wrote a song based on a philosophy that he picks up from Bob Dylan and how you pick up anything from Bob Dylan? I don’t know, because I’ve seen him in concert. What was that in a way? Oh, it was phenomenal. We was over at the Musker. Mesker Mesker amphitheater across from the zoo and Evansville.

No, that’s not Yeah, that’s a Osborn.

I have no idea what he said. But there are lyrics that you can find and, and so this guy, Joshua Raiden, writes this song called no envy and no fear, which is something he picked up from a Bob Dylan quote. And I think there’s power to that. Envy is just you wanting what someone else has. And fear is just a lie that you tell yourself. And I think we can do away with all of that. So

the grass isn’t greener. That’s one. That’s it? That’s kind of adds to Okay. The grass isn’t greener. Yeah,

I like it. So I’m sure we could both come up with 100 things if we had time. But I just want to encourage people to be real, and start writing down what your core driving principles, values and beliefs are. And I don’t mean beliefs, like I believe in God, the Father, Son, Holy Spirit, like that’s fine. That’s good to have that you gotta have your creed. Right? But you want to also know what are the principles that drive me that if pressed, will not break? Because there are my friends times when people and situations come to us? And we have a decision to make? Will we? Or won’t we? Will we do the deal where people might get hurt? Will we climb on the backs of the susceptible and vulnerable to gain success? Will we step out on our loving faithful relationships? Will we or will we not end we have to be principled we have to know what our moral compass is directing us toward? We have to stay true to that. And if we don’t know what our principles are, then we can’t stay true. It’s really important that we figure out what are our core driving values and beliefs. Find them. Stand there. Don’t move. That’s all. That’s it. Be principled or die trying.

Thank you so much for listening Ladies and Gents You are Love far more than you’ll know.

From Nathan, from Jonathan, thanks for listening. This is your data