What’s going on in your mind? You are Nathan is sitting with his face attached to the microphone, his eyes closed. As if it’s a kind of maybe meditative or. Yeah, state.
I’m trying to put what just happened together in my mind.
much talk about it that might help you feel better.
We had someone come into the studio and employee doing a great job. They call the family. The family said, Well, let me backtrack the family. don’t even want to talk about this.
Gonna let you answer that for yourself. As he’s telling though. Do you like my therapist voice?
Yeah, it’s really good. I just we.
Basically, we, you. And this employee had a conversation, I was privy to it because I’m in the studio conversation was the funeral home was able to save a family some money, and the family member was probably so over the whole thing. They didn’t want to even have the conversation begin with, didn’t take it as a savings, got frustrated and took it out on the employee. And then made threats to publicly a sale. The funeral home for bad business practices, which actually it was the opposite. It was best practices of transparency, and excellence in service. exceptional service. So I don’t think it’s anything to be worried about her upset about,
you know, the movie hitch. When Kevin James is in the in the conference room with whatever her name is. And they’re talking about all of our finances, and he’s trying to impress her, and it’s not even relatable and he stands up he goes, You know what, I quit? Second, that’s what that moment was for man.
Yeah. Maybe you should say that maybe should go out in the hallway right now. And you know that. So Nathan is removed his headphones. He is walking confidently and purposefully out of the studio. That’s the door and you heard it out loud. I think I think we all heard it you feel better. Sorry about that. Oh, the headphones are way back here. So do you feel better? Is it okay to we kind of move forward? I feel better. Okay, I’m ready. A hot man. You’re a hot mess Express at the moment. Speaking of coming in hot, this is your day.
This is my day. I think. I think I’m okay. I’m okay. I’m okay. I just I just scream really, really loud and echoed and
it’s good. All right. I’m better. Glad you’re better. I feel better. Nathan told me the other day that I had the the male version of Delilah you do you do? I’m afraid it’s gonna cause people to go to sleep while they’re driving. But guess what the rumble strips are
made for Delilah. Okay. All right. Yeah, absolutely. she I think she has those patented.
Well, welcome to your diatribe. Fries are made What are you reading right now? Not right now. But I mean, these days, these new days post epiphany early in January still relatively speaking. What do you what are you listening to? What are you reading? For us this 34th episode of you’ll die trying.
I’m reading the top of my traveler lid Solo cup for my coffee.
Yes, Cena literally right now.
Literally. I am that one.
that one? That one book? No. If you look across the scaling up book, oh, yeah, I am now like 30. It’s a deep deep read. Okay. So it’s not something that you just drive through. And you’re like, Okay, that makes sense. If you open it up, there’s a lot of graphs and scales and a lot of research and I was on page like 14 Two weeks ago and now I’m on page like 3030 to check it out. It was given to me by a very successful business person and they work very closely with very successful business people. It was a very thoughtful gift and I am reading it I’m chiseling away at it. In other words, it’s it’s a difficult read. It is a difficult read not want to soak it up. I am reading that I’m listening to the sword in the scale or sword anto, that’s another podcast. Yeah, sword and scale. It is a podcast not for the faint of heart. Someone like myself who’s always been interested in mysteries and crime, history or crime stories that have either gone unsolved and or solved. There’s a lot of really, really sad things that have happened in the country. And so this narrator goes about talking about crimes that have been committed throughout the country and actually plays like recordings and dispositions and depositions is a deposition. Yeah, so disposition Correct. Got it. It’s really interesting. Okay, a lot of really eerie music, and it’s not something to listen to when your kids are around. It’s not something you want to listen to when people who aren’t comfortable with that stuff around as cursing in it.
Yeah. That’s a crime. Narrative crime drama, you know, the making of our murder all that stuff that that’s all very hot these days. Oh, no, but that’s about
people like watching the train wreck. People like, people like that stuff. I think i i My father in law’s was born in the 40s. And it was cowboys and Indians for forever. Yeah. One of the the cowboys and Indians up until like the 70s. And then there’s chips.
Yeah, I love chip chips was such a good show was a great show. Didn’t done. Number Paanch.
I don’t know that. Is this the name of a person in this? Yeah, it was.
His last name is Estrada. He was the actor,
Is that it? No, I don’t know. But he was the he was one of the two primarily primary chips members John was the name of the John Sakata and George Estrada. Yeah, but yeah,
I don’t think John Scott was a pop artists in the 90s I
just think it’s interesting that people get all up in those crime shows and I don’t know. There’s something to that. It’s not me though. I’m not really into it. People have asked me to watch that. That show and it’s just not my thing. I don’t have a real dance with the McCobb
you like watching shows about dance though?
Don’t you do like
man I’m not really into anything like you know masculine or murder mystery. I like more of the dance. Oh,
No, I don’t want to go there. I’m
totally I’m totally kidding look up we got an hour the Democrats don’t want to gender based on crime drama. Watchers.
I know. Let’s see literally gonna be all women. It really is. I’m googling right now. I’m gonna say demographic for crime drama. Gossip.
So me so bad.
It’s vi E. H. That’s mean, W. O declining ratings. Yeah, who watches crime dramas? There you go. Let’s see what happens here.
is not going to be good. I really feel bad. I should have said that saying
that. I shouldn’t have said that. I totally called me out as being non masculine. Because I don’t watch crime dramas and I do watch dance. And let me say something about the men who dance. No, I they are the strongest people out there. Speaking of strong people out there. I want to tell you what I’m reading. Thanks for asking.
What do you read? Dr. Carol,
I’m reading a book called can’t hurt me. By David Goggins. It is not a book that I’m recommending. You’re not at all recommending. I’m not recommending it, although I enjoy it thoroughly, but it is written by a man who has spent a significant amount of time in the military. And, as a result has picked up a significant chunk of military vocabulary, which is often offensive and unsuitable for certain people, probably including myself, but I’m looking past it because the book is so very, very good. David Goggins was born in February of 1975. So we’re the same age and that’s embarrassing, because what tell you he has become an ultra marathoner. The kind of person who will run 100 miles a minute for like, two nights straight, just straight running. An ultra long distance cyclist triathlete. He, at one time held the Guinness world record for the number of pull ups in 24 hours. He did over 4000 Pull ups in 17 hours. 4000
Plus how many pull ups can you not do in for 24 hours
4000 plus. So what happened though, was you know, he was he was reared in Brazil, Indiana, which is a primarily Caucasian community and he’s African American and he considers himself like he was like the only one like in italics in the book. I was the only one right and His father was absent. His mom worked a lot. She was as a result absent. His stepfather was great, but he died of a murder pretty quick, pretty soon on, which was a source of deep grief. So he felt very much alone and he was bullied. And it was kind of a classic American tragedy of a young African American child who became a teen who didn’t do well cheated on everything failed all of his classes, etc. One day got up. After having been confronted by his mother about his grades, and she wasn’t getting on him about it like she should have, he ended up getting on himself. So he looks in the mirror in the bathroom wipes the steam away. And he just, he just climbs all over himself. He gets angry at himself. He holds himself accountable for the first time ever. teenager in high school, shaves his head, shapes his, you know, whiskers, and basically tried to become a new person. So he ended up not doing very well in school, but he enlisted with the Air Force after failing several times the Air Force academic exam, he passed it. And he did really well until he ended up having a medic medical discharge in the middle of some significant training. Then he goes to work for Ecolab. He’s literally changing rat traps, mouse traps and cockroach things all night long. While restaurants are closed fast food restaurants. One night, he’s in this fast food restaurant, the name of which he will not share because he doesn’t want to be sued. And he opens a drawer or whatever. And all of a sudden, he sees cockroaches just pouring out of the wall. He starts feeling what feels like raindrops on his neck, and they’re cockroaches dropping onto his neck. So he literally of course, is covered and cockroaches in this fast food restaurant. So it goes outside. He leaves all of his equipment, gets in the truck goes home gets a milkshake grabs a sleeve of Krispy Kreme chocolate covered doughnuts, goes to take a shower and watches this thing on Navy SEALs, ends up at 300 pounds applying to become a Navy SEAL. He’s told Yeah, you can do it. If you do within you have to within six months because of your age. And you have to lose 100 pounds. And so he has to lose 100 pounds in three months. And he did it. And after failing out of one of the Bud’s trainings, which is the basic underwater demolition SEAL training, he came back for a second term ended up being the top of his class and joined US Navy SEALs, three, I think and served in the war and has become an unbelievable example of what can happen when you change your mind. That’s what I’m reading. Good lord. Think about the discipline it takes I know to go from 300 pounds to 191 pounds in three months. And to study for this academic test which he he was just self admittedly terrible at. And he had to get a certain score. He worked night and day. I mean, he would be in the gym six hours a day, he would study six hours a day. Then he had this basic fear of water. So he had to kind of do because obviously seals training. It’s a lot of underwater stuff. And when he describes this training, I mean it is ridiculous. Like you’ve seen those videos. Oh, yeah. It’s It’s unbelievable.
National Geographic has those shows on there. And they put them in those to simulate like a plane crash and stuff. And they tumble Oh, wow.
Oh, yeah. I mean, after you know, you have your first phase of SEAL training. And within first phase is Hell Week and hell week is from Sunday to Friday. And literally they’re basically doing everything they can to break you and kill you mentally, if not physically. And I mean, the descriptions of things that they had to do is unbelievable for you out there who are in the military, we certainly say thank you to you for your service, Special Forces people. Thank you for your dedication and commitment. There is nothing like having a mind that can do that. At one point, not a fan of water. He’s 15 feet deep. This is at the end of hell week. He has nothing left. And they have to do five knots underwater. Before they can go up and get it really do one go up and get a breath come back down. And at some point, the instructors like go down and do three on one breath or you fail. Literally you leave. You’re out of BUDS training, and you’ve already been in hell week you like you’ve passed all the hard stuff. And, you know, he, David Goggins, ended up doing it. There’s a great podcast that he did in February of 2018. On the Joe Rogan podcast, Oh, awesome. And his his podcasts are like two hours. So to our listeners, you’re welcome. You are but two hours plus and David Goggins is one of them. He did a recent one, I think in November, December of last year, too, but listen to that first one. Again, watch the language there it is, but it’s, it’s guys an incredible inspiration. But what it does is it tells me that you can callus your mind. Like you can callus your fingers playing guitar, lifting weights, you know how the the kind of the ball of your hand will get callus with those bars and dumbbells, your mind like that can become so calloused that you can, in fact, basically be and do anything. He’s an example of that
the discipline throughout, not just the losing of the way in six months, not just Well, I think the largest was of course competing and completing to become a Navy SEAL at the top of your class. The moment at the restaurant, when you have cockroaches pouring on your head, you walk out, go to your car, and you’re like, you know what? I quit. I legitimately, this is not me. I’m not doing this. I’m not putting myself through this. I quit to be able to do that. Because I’m sure some of you listening right now are in a situation where you have just just immense amount of pressure. And let’s just use the analogy of a cockroach is all over you. And you’re like, I do not like where I am at. But you haven’t done the done the most difficult and it’s just starting anew. Yeah. And he did that.
He did it. That’s you did it. You did it just now when you went out in the in the void the what? For your fit for for you. That’s okay, that’s good. I was thinking for your investable and ended up voyeur. And that’s not that’s not at all relatable to this another part of your personality we’ll talk about later, but you quit earlier. No, do you quit and you said I don’t done. I’m doing something different. So what are you going to do differently now? Right now? Yeah, cuz you quit earlier? Like he did? Oh, yeah.
I’m gonna. Yeah,
what do you need to do to cry?
I need to text Bailey, change your thinking I need to probably text Bailey right now and tell her that that was just a joke, because she probably is wondering what is going on? Up in the office? What do I need to do to change my? My life? Yeah.
I mean, you know, you had
this moment that I have right now. Okay, so I’ve done it. Okay. I hate waking up in the middle of the night to take care of the baby. Not because I hate taking care of the baby, let me be very, very clear. I cannot, I am not one to operate properly. If I’m in a dead sleep and wake up. It’s like, okay, here’s the bottle. here’s the here’s the diapers, here’s the baby wipes, here’s this I am one ion and miserable, okay. And I don’t feel that I’m giving Navy the attention that he deserves. So what I’ve done is I have taken the shift the night shift. So from 9pm until I literally cannot function anymore. And I know I need a few hours of sleep. I’ll take that. And I’m up. I’m up. I mean, I’m reading, reading good things. I’m listening to podcasts, and I’m using that time. It’s not only take care of our son, but to better my mind. And it’s working tremendously. Am I tired? Absolutely. But I know that I’m I know that if I’m not on the night shift, and I’m woken up during the night shift. I will not be a happy camper. Yeah. So that’s what I’ve got for you, man. That’s something I’m doing.
Hot, this this little transformer thing. It’s probably because it’s about to explode. What about me? Well, you know, I think every single day I’m working on something like right now I’m certainly working on getting healthier, working on taking better care of my person, my body, my mind. Certainly focusing on being more positive. You know, you read a book like that. And what’s great about that book, and he wrote it himself. I mean, does it list a ghostwriter? I guess there could have been, but it’s it’s really, really well written as analogies are great. And you get the sense that like, you know, anybody whether you are a Military Warrior, or you are a salesperson getting really big, ready for the biggest pitch of your life, or you are a small business owner, or you are an educator, whoever you are, there are opportunities for you to change how you think about yourself, and to push and challenge yourself to points where you did not think possible. And right. When you think you’re going to break. You smile at that, and you push harder. And there’s this like second wind, your scientists have not really been able to determine what to determine what the second wind is, whether it’s a push of endorphins, or adrenaline, or whether it’s two or three other potential things, but the second wind is a real thing. And David Goggins tells the story about when they were, they were literally it was, they were unable to move, and they just wanted to get into the minds of They’re instructors because they’re instructors that are getting into their minds. And he has this process that he calls taking souls. And it’s where he gets into the mind of his opponent. In this case, it was the instructor. So he got with his team, called a boat crew. And they have to pick up their boat, throw it over their head, slam it down on the ground and do it again, they have to do that until they’re told to stop. And they weren’t being told to do it. They were in a break. And they were like, Let’s do it. So at the end, when they had nothing left to give, that whole team lifted that boat over their heads, and scream something at the instructor, something like you will never beat boat crew to slamming on the ground back overheads slamming. And the instructor just had his mouth open. Like, who are these guys? That was a boat crew that never lost a race. They never lost the entire training. They want every time and he was in the lead. Because he changed his mind. 300 pounds with a milkshake and a sleeve of doughnuts at 3am afterwork. And he changed his mind. Why Can’t We?
We can. I’m going to I’m going to right now.
Every single day, every daily commitment, it’s a minute by minute commitment.
Yeah. Yep. What is something else you’re gonna change your mind about i to add to you? Taddy? What had to what you said there we go on there is being positive. Yeah, we are in a trying time. The world itself is trying. The professions that we are in are trying, and it would be dumb of us to not try or be consistent with being positive. Because we’ll just be in a rabbit hole of sadness and mediocrity, yuck.
Yeah, there shouldn’t be any room for mediocrity. We need to push ourselves challenge ourselves, you know, we don’t have the benefit of having that that person outside of us. There’s a great video, and I don’t know what movie it’s from. But everybody who watches it seems to know and they don’t ever say because they all know. But it’s the video of this high school football team. And there’s the leader of the team, he might be he’s probably alignment. He’s a big guy. And basically, the team has all they don’t have any confidence in the coach or in each other varsity blues. Maybe the guy, the team player, the high school football team player gets on the in the endzone, and the coach tells this other player to come and get on his back. And he’s going to do like the Death crawl, which is where you’re on your hands and your feet. And you’re just having to crawl basically like a crab. But he’s got another player fully suited up on his back. And the coach is like you have to go 20 yards, and he’s blindfolded. And the coach is yelling at him 20 yards, and she’s a guy that has no idea how far he’s going. I have chills right now just thinking about it. And a guy’s coach, I can’t go any farther. He’s like, You have to get to the 20. Coach, you can’t get any farther. Okay, he’s like you have to push and it keeps going, keeps going, keeps going. And the coach now is down on his hands and knees than the coaches down on his own belly. And he’s yelling at this player, you have it in you, you have to do this, no one can do this for you. And the gown is still on his back. And he’s pouring sweat. And you can tell he’s like on the verge of breaking. He’s like do not quit, keep going, keep going. And it goes and he goes, and he goes. And he says take off your blindfold. And he’s in the other end.
That is incredible. And it is not varsity blues
100 yards when he was told to go 20 All because he had somebody right beside him saying you can do it, you must do it. We don’t have that. Not all of us do. If you’re a coach, take note if you’re an instructor, a teacher, some form of of educator or encourager, take note, but when we don’t have that person in our lives, guess who has to be that person ourselves? Absolutely. So I have to do what he did. I have to look at myself in the mirror every day. And I have to tell myself what today is going to be what I’m going to do what I’m not going to do, what I’m going to push myself on and what I’m going to push myself on beyond that. And if I’m not doing those things, I’m missing opportunities.
That’s funny. You said look in the mirror, I’ll tell on myself. This morning when I was getting up. I get up before the kids and before Megan and I got out of the shower and I had my routine and I looked at myself in the mirror. And I had this sigh and I caught myself because the sigh was almost like tar. It was just a very, it was a weak moment that I had with myself and I looked in the mirror and I had a mental. I really did mentally said you got this. Mm hmm. But my tie on? I came to work. Yep. Good. You got to do it every
day, every day have he calls it the accountability mirror. And David Goggins that is and he covers it with post it notes, you know, things inspiring things are or imperatives to himself, whatever. Everybody has to have that self accountability. And the people who don’t are the people who they end up compromised, or they end up maybe being a little bit more cowardly, or they end up weak, not vulnerable, but truly weak. And I know that because there are parts of my mind that that are weak. I mean, we’re doing an exercise routine and I’m, I have this thing prescribed to do and I get like, you know, two minutes in, I’m like, I’m done. I’ve gotta quit. I’ve got 20 minutes left. No, I’ll never make it. Like, I know that there are parts of me that are weak. But I also know that that doesn’t have to be the case. You know, we’re watching this new show that Dwayne The Rock Johnson has with Titan. It’s the Titan games. Yeah, I’m a big fan of Dwayne The Rock Johnson, he’s really great guy, but from what I see, but this show, there was this one female contestant. And she was told as a child that her heart was sick, and she’s gonna have to be be on medicine her whole life, or have surgery or treat her heart like a muscle and work it out. And she chose option three. And I won’t spoil it for anyone who hasn’t seen it on Hulu, but she she is mighty. She treats her heart like a muscle and works and I think our brain should be treated the same way.
This is a really good thing for us to be talking about.
I need this for myself. I definitely need this. And this is certainly accountability because you know, we’re not just talking the two of us there are other people out there.
Yeah. And as you say these things I’m like, gritting my teeth with excitement. Yes, it’s it’s so important to be accountable to oneself. And maybe if you can have someone to be account to vote for you with you so important workout partner partners, you know, people who are literally like, hey, check yourself Wonderboy offices, for instance, they were going through this phase we were just like joking to the point of the jokes became almost like, like they had like a negative undertone biting, they’re biting. And we got together, we’re like, you know what, this isn’t happening again, and we don’t. So this is like there’s four guys in the office that are just being accountable, holding each other up holding each other up. That’s, that’s the visual I want for this episode to be of just like lifting yourself up. You know, like, I hope that I hold you up, I hope, I know you hold me up. But for those of you listening, hold yourself up, hold your held self to this high standard. And this understanding that you can genuinely with just a flip of a thought, change it.
There’s this great story in the New Testament in the gospels, where this man is is unable to walk and his friends here that Jesus comes to town. So Jesus is in this home because there aren’t convention centers. And the place is packed and people are pouring out all over the streets, all over down the alleyways just trying to get a glimpse and to be within earshot. Because they’ve heard that this guy is a healer, right? These four people look at their friend who is not able to walk. And they’re like, we’re taking you, we’re going to get you, we’re going to put you in an audience with that man, and we’re going to get you fixed. They couldn’t get there. There’s no way they were literally four men carrying a guy on a cot. And when I say cut, think about like MASH, like hauling a guy out of the war zone with two long sticks and a piece of canvas between it right at best. There’s they weren’t getting there, what they do, they climbed up on the roof, which was not made of shingles and wood, it was made of clay and dirt. And they dug out a hole. And the four of them lowered the man down into Jesus presence. And Jesus said, because of the faith of your friends, take your mat, get up and walk. That’s how important it is to have a community around you. And that guy was healed because of his friends. Awesome, beautiful story. I love that story. So surround yourself with good people. Have someone who will help you be accountable. And don’t be mad at them when they’re there. Like I thought you said you didn’t want chips. I mean, I don’t judge but you told me to tell you Yeah, don’t get mad. I’m they’re just doing what you ask them to my wife is my accountability partner. Don’t need to Quit bothering me Stop judging, but you tell I don’t care what I told you. So you always have to say no matter what I say from this point forward, hold me accountable until I can learn to do it myself. Because ultimately that’s the goal, right to depend on other people. But yeah, I’m very grateful to have my wife who can do that for me and who works out with me and will eat healthily with me and oftentimes will prep that stuff for me when I’m not there. It’s incredible. It’s a lot easier to do something like that when you have someone else. And these, the seal. Trainees find that community in each other because they’re not competing against one another. They’re competing against themselves. And so they have each other as that accountability and they Learn. That’s respect, you are amazing. Just by being here. I respect you for that. Let’s figure out how we can put our gifts together and get both of us through this thing. And that’s basically life. Find people who can help you. Use your gifts to get you through this thing.
When we send over an episode of Brent, our producer who we talked about and referenced a lot in this podcast. I always say to him, this is the best episode. This is the best episode for me right now, in this moment. I love this episode. It is so important for me to hear this. Be accountable to oneself, help others remain accountable, be that partner for someone and be that for yourself, and hold yourself up to a standard and knowing that you can literally literally do anything. I appreciate you. Thank you for sharing that.
Thank you too. I am I’m Jonathan. I’m Nathan. This is your data