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Ep 58 – Before You Go to Spain

It is nice to be here. The psi says it all. How’s your day?

Good? Sort of.

Yeah, ish. Busy. It’s good. Good, busy. It’s good.

I mean, you can gauge how busy I am. And I with you our responses via text. It’s like,

yeah, when we’re down to like, not even one word. We’re like, we’re texting guttural sounds like who?

Yes, yes. And I always feel bad. I just

don’t feel bad on my account. I know you don’t care. I don’t even read your text. Well, that’s fine. It’s not true. No, but I know that we’re both in very engaged spaces, because we’ve had a more challenging time getting together for these purposes.

I know. It’s wild.

It’s been good stuff, though. Yeah.

I think it’s we’re in the valleys of death, but in a good way. It’s like we’re growing. Yeah, everybody.

Yeah. Yeah, that’s good. Have you done your taxes?

I don’t know. Janice, help. We answered that question for me. Wow. You know, there’s just comes a point when they get really, really messy, and you just pass it off, and you just assume Listen, I have no room to talk while you’re talking. I’m going to send an email if that’s okay. I really now I’m nervous because

it is 100% Out of my jurisdiction really nervous now in my family and business says, Joy is 100% in charge of that. And I have nothing but utter faith. But I mean, basically, I’m there just to be supportive and answer questions here. And there. She does it all.

I just sent that. I don’t know. I don’t know what you just said. But I just sent a text about I think you’re talking about how Joy does everything. Yeah, what are the taxes? Because that’s not your

world as well. Yeah, just Yeah, I can’t do it. But

one plus one is too good. You’re good. Oh,

yeah, I’m decent with numbers. Because I have a calculator on my phone. Right? But, uh, it’s that it’s not that it’s just the specifics of like QuickBooks and alternating between businesses and doing expenses and categorizing expenses and reconciling QuickBooks with your bank. I mean, it’s like, it’s awful. She’s really good at. I’m not

just I don’t, is it okay, that I don’t want to be good at that.

Yes. I don’t want to either I need to learn how to do it in the event that I would need to step up and do that. But I really don’t want to I feel like I’m just going to hand it off to an accountant and say, you know, could you do this for us?

You go home today. And Joy’s like, you know what, Jay? I just had don’t want to do that anymore for you. So here you go. You handle this? It’s like, no,

it’s a very high probability.

I mean, Julie could literally at the drop badge, be like, You know what, I love you, but I’m not helping you in this.

Yes. No. And then we’re doomed that don’t even think I don’t think for a second that that could happen, because I do. She likes it. She’s really good at it. And she’s happy now. Because she’s on this end of it. Yeah. And we look back and we failed. I mean, we submitted our information to our accountant. Yesterday, it was March 24 of 2018. And so she’s right on, right on target. We’re never those early filers, like people are like, January 3, fomitopsis. Like, Oh, that’s good for you. Yeah, not gonna do it. Yeah. Why would I do that? I have plenty of time.

Mr. procrastinator? Yeah. That’s what I am. I think that was my middle name. Nathan P. Morris.

That’s good. I didn’t know that’s what the P stood for. clarify something absolutely. Well, I

am Nathan P. Morris.

I am Jonathan the taxman, Carol

and you are you and we are grateful that you are here it is episode number 58 I don’t know who

this is. You’ll die trying I do know that. Yes, it is. Welcome everyone.

Dr ma Tiger Woods just something

Have you been watching sports on TV? Nope.

Okay, it was just a golf club. It was like let’s come out of the

I didn’t know if you’re watching some PGA thing and got into the no why please

The only time I turned it on the Golf Channel is whenever I want to take a nap. Yeah. Okay. Is that noise that sounds awesome. Commentators voices are incredible. They’re so bad then. Yes. It just like the air.

If you were going to be a commentator for any sport. And the network was going to select you for that sport. What sport would they select you for? Oh oh, Soccer. Yeah, football. Why do we not call it football?

I don’t know. Why are we weird? And why do they call it the World Series? If they’re just playing the baseball game in the United States of America and they’re just United States teams?

That’s true because there are other countries who have baseball. Yes. I don’t. I don’t know. Is the Little League World Series also only national?

No, it literally is international. So does it make sense to me silly. Come on.

Have you ever been to a professional? soccer game?

No. No by either.

I would love to me too.

I would love to Nashville has a team do they? Yep. What are they called? Alma assume they’re called something with music like sounds what Okay, that’s

a Nashville sounds. I’m gonna Google it because the hockey team is the predators. The football team is the Titans there’s no baseball team although there’s a triple A team there. Oh, they might be the sounds. I think that’s the baseball team the Nashville sounds I think it’s like a triple or maybe even a double A to be way wrong.

Because it says right here that they’re not Nashville, SC Yeah. Soccer Club. Yeah. Oh,

that’s it. Because in Europe, they’re like FC.

Wait, here’s the Nashville sounds there’s a Nashville sounds but I don’t know what this is. See? It’s right here. Thing baseball. That’s baseball.

I think it’s probably W okay.

You if you have come here for like a sports. You’re gone. You’re gone. Mike gross would know that. Well, he’s not here. Nope. He was. He’s listening though.

Hey, Mike. So you said that you wanted to? To have a little a little chat today?

Well, yeah, because you’re leaving and you’re going away. You’re going, it doesn’t matter. And I was thinking that got me thinking about like codependency because I mean, maybe can’t say I’m not, but I’m codependent of having you around. And then I start thinking about codependency with work, then I start thinking about codependency with life. And there are a lot of people in this world who are codependent of each other, and they have to have each other to be reliant on each other for people to exist. So I’m just wanting to really touch base on that, because I really think that a lot of people can get something out of it. I don’t even know where to start, though, by the way.

Well, it is a reality in many, many a relationship, especially marriages, especially marriages that have been going on for a long time, although not necessarily just that. But you can imagine if you’re 70 years old, and you’ve been in a marriage for, you know, 45 years, that you will have come to expect your spouse to predictably perform in a certain way. And oftentimes that is to do something for you. And after all those years, you probably quit being grateful you start taking things for granted. And then you just assume and then now you predict now you need and when the other person isn’t able to provide it causes some problems. I think I’ve mentioned before previous episode, a couple that I worked with clinically once where the man was alcoholic. The woman was a chatter member I talked about Yes, he dried up, she got sick, he started drinking she got well. Ultimately, he died. But it’s a very sad and that’s a that’s a clinical and very chronic case of codependence if you want to read about this, there’s an author who’s written two really good books Her name is Melody Beatty. First Book and an older book is called codependent no more. The subsequent book in a much more recent volume is called the new codependent. At the end of the day, codependency requires two people, and it’s the CO so I couldn’t be codependent on you and you’d not be co dependent on me. Right. So together, we kind of we would be completing that circuit. However, the circuit is this kind of very small, closed caption cyclical kind of sickness that yields us both dependent on one another, less obviously independent and as a result, much more needy. And relationships that are comprised of that kind of neediness or need fullness, end up being very intense. So I need from you you need from me that that kind of dynamic generates an energy. If you can imagine it being like an electrical energy, and the more I need, the more you need. And so I’ve got my hands and my fingers are now interlocking and I’m shaking like that’s that’s how I imagined it. pictographic Lee, how a relationship happens becomes very intense, very agitated. And in our world in the therapeutic world, we call that relationship anxiety. The secret to dissolving that codependency and improving yourself and your relationship is available for you at 1995 at WWE. The secret to that is to develop a stronger, more stable, more solid sense of self Within the context of your relationship 70 year olds not going to do that, though. Well, what’s interesting is I’m working with some of them. And they are doing it wrong. Okay? Well, because the assumption is an old dog can’t be taught. But it isn’t true. Old Dogs absolutely can be taught new tricks. And 70 year old person, of course, is not an old dog by any stretch. They are a human being with complex thinking and the ability to expand horizons and challenge themselves. And I’m amazed at some of the people that I’m having a privilege of walking alongside and talking with every week. Where they are, mean, what somebody said today, after a conversation about precisely this, which is so interesting that you brought this up, because it’s been my day to day. And one of those people said today, you know, this is going to be difficult. Because the pattern we’re in is the pattern we’ve been in for four decades. And we can do this. I was like, good for you. That’s all it takes. Is that kind of positive? Can do stick to it kind of attitude that says, okay, just because I’ve been operating a certain way forever, doesn’t mean I can’t make adjustments. And I believe they will.

What about the people that are on the outside but recognize codependency? And how do you work alongside walk alongside? Love alongside these people?

Can you give me an example?

Hmm. I just I think I’m gonna just keep it general. Because I just, I think there are a lot of people that struggle with it in different areas and angles. And

do you mean being on the outside and seeing seeing go to tell many to others? Yeah, just

so many people that are in my life? Sure. But even not necessarily in mind. And in yours who are listening, you’re seeing these people that are like, Oh, my God, there’s like something happening here is like a pattern. How do you? How do you? I don’t know, work with walk with.

My best thinking about that is that if it doesn’t belong to me, there’s probably nothing I can do to directly impact that.

How do you okay, that’s easy to say? Okay. So how do you put that into place? Because you say that? I’m sitting here thinking very deeply right now. Because you said, we talked about how whatever people think about me is none of my business. But like, That’s not mine. If I don’t give anybody Power Hour, you know, that kind of thing. So it’s hard to to put that in play all the time, man,

why do you think that’s true? No, I mean, I don’t disagree.

I don’t know.

Was it hard for you?

I’ve asked myself that question before, and I’m not sure the answer.

Did you say self? Why is this hard for you? I didn’t say it like that. Maybe that’s the difference. Maybe you have to actually talk to yourself.

I have thought in my head. Why? Why is this so difficult? Self? Why is this so difficult? There

you go. Now we’re talking.

I don’t have the answer. Well,

I think something that you said earlier might be a clue. And you said, you know, some 70 year old person married forever, they’re not going to be able to do that. And maybe that’s a part of our US assumptions, is I’m assuming we may make assumptions based on our observations, maybe you know, a lot of people in that age group that you don’t see working on themselves. Right, I have to tell you, though, I have I’m gonna say about 5% of my census is made up of people 70 and older.

Wow, I would have never thought that maybe even more, I would have never thought that I would have thought it was a lot of my age 30 You said and there are? Obviously no take most of

it, there are plenty, but there are a lot of people kind of in that 40 to 60 range, too, because of course, you know, these are career professionals and, and are they believe in the value of working on self and they believe in investing in that because that’s, that’s part of it, you know, is that when you’re when you’re exchanging that hard earned money into the hands of another person for a service rendered, you’re investing in that. And it means you’re going to pay a closer kind of attention. You’re going to take note, you’re going to work in between sessions, you know, doing the kind of maybe suggested work in you’re going to challenge yourself because you’re literally and emotionally invested. But anyway, yes. So I do have a large portion of my senses that would fit into your age group too, but five to 8% being in their 70s or older. That’s pretty awesome. And you think about it says a lot

about somebody wanting to change even even in later in life. My next question though, is, is Coda That’s bad. Because I always think of it as like this. I don’t know, I feel like someone who is codependent of the other. I don’t know that that’s a good thing. I look at it as bad.

Well, you know how I would respond to that, right? Yeah. That rather than think about it in terms of good or bad, I want to think about it in terms of how it functions. And more often than not, I find codependency functioning to increase anxiety and stress in relationships, systems, and therefore individuals in those systems. I don’t think that it’s very liberating for people, right. And I’m interested in liberation and transformation. I want people to feel free and feel changed. And ultimately, that’s up to them. But when you’re in a long standing relationship that’s indicative of some codependent traits and characteristics. It takes an act of deep bravery and courage to be able to challenge those long standing dynamics. But again, totally not impossible. Just sometimes you just need somebody to kind of counsel and coach you through it. And that’s what I love to do. Yeah. So I wouldn’t say that it’s good or bad. I don’t think that it’s healthy. Yeah, I definitely think codependency is an unhealthy model for relationship systems. It’s a way to kind of create balance you think. But ultimately, it puts your relationship in dis equilibrium. We think it brings comfort, but really, it brings us into an agitated intimacy. It’s like when I was in college, we camped a lot my senior year, I think we slept more on the Appalachian Trail than we did in our NASA dorm room. And we would hike various sections, friends of mine and I during things like Easter and other breaks, we have never hiked the entire 80. But I have hiked a little teeny sections of it. And we ran into these people once who were in one of these kind of trail provided shelters. It’s literally like a lean to with a floor up off the ground and a bunch of people just in there and sleeping bags. And these guys were were drinking alcohol at a flasks and they offered it to her, she had no things. They were like, Oh, you got to have it warm, it’s freezing out here, it was like 20 degrees, it really warms you up. What they don’t know is that while it feels warm going down, it’s actually constricting their capillaries, causing their core body temperature to drop. So while codependency feels good, it is constricting the circulation of the relationship causing you to be very intense, and causing the core temperature of your love for one another. To drop.

That’s a great analogy. It even happens in the work. I mean, it’s it’s very much a workplace thing, too. I received a text the other day and the text was can you come and help? And then they told me the situation via text. They knew the answer. But they knew that I was within close proximity. Yes, yeah. And so it deliberately did not assist them. told them what they already knew. And they handled the situation. I think that I don’t know how we are to train or we’re from a work perspective, or I don’t know how we’re supposed to combat that.

Yeah. Well, I think the question to ask there because typically, we will we would look at that. And we would say okay, what do we need to do to that staff person to inspire a more independent perspective and more independent approach, more disciplined, independent approach to work? I think, though, that that aim is misguided because I think we’re always better to begin the Reformation and transformation with ourselves. So I believe self reflection, self criticism, a healthy sense of what criticism means, like serious, thoughtful engagement, not like negativity. And I think that’s always the place to start. So let me ask you, how do you think you contribute to that?

Well, I know for a fact you’ve been talking to me about this for months, and I brought it up in previous podcasts happen here. And willing, I’ll gel help, I’ll help I’ll help up. And now I’ve taken a step back on the balcony, and they bench just gonna have to be relearned thing for them. Yeah. So I’ve contributed on me on that.

Yeah, man named Ron Heifetz wrote a book in which he talked about this, but this thing you just alluded to the balcony work. And it’s really challenging to step out of those old patterns that feel very familiar and comfortable and workable. And to come up and look down and say, Oh, I see how I’ve been functioning. I can see how that’s not that’s been maybe chopping off at the knees, the organization’s efficiency possibilities. So I’m going to do something different. But you know, when we do something different people react to that right? Because they’re not used to that new way because they’ve become accustomed to in the case that you just provided you stepping in to help. And when you don’t, they’re like, oh gosh is Nathan Madami Did I do something wrong? Gosh, I really liked it when he would help. When I asked, I wish he would change back. It’s the same change back responses. We talked about a previous episode, you’re wrong. I like to better the old way change back or else. These are the things we hear when we began to effect some change in relationships in our own functioning. People will think gosh, he’s not, it’s not helping anymore feels like a rejection to them, when really all you’re doing is standing still, and empowering them to take care of themselves. So I think you know, this is what highlights the fact that we’re all still to some extent, underdeveloped children emotionally speaking. And we really need a lot of affirmation. We need a lot of emotional care we need you know, we’re still bartering and negotiating and navigating and jockeying for, for acceptance and approval, admiration, even if we could just push pause and all of that and say, You know what, I know what I’m here to do, I know how to do it, I’m going to do it. Well, I’m going to ask for help only when I need it, but I am going to ask for it when I need it. I’m going to be available if someone you know thinks that they need it as well. And I’m just going to focus on on me and my own functioning. The Golden and Silver rules play all the time I tell the kids this all the time, if you would just pay attention to the golden rule. And my daughter was like, what’s the golden rule? failed as a parent? So I said it and said it and said it and had them say it and say it, say it back again. Repeat, repeat, repeat until they became muscle memory. Right? Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you. That place the Silver Rule don’t do for others what they should do for themselves. That place to that rule right there protects you from codependency

and not worry if they think that you’re mad at them or whatever, when in all reality you are, you know, sitting still that love that. Love that visual,

that previous rule, you can’t let fear of what other people are thinking about you interrupt your functioning.

So what am I supposed to do while you’re gone? Just sit here and wait for you?

I mean, I think so. I think if I were to say yes, that’s what I want to know, demonstrate my car. Yeah. Oh, well, I mean, I’m excited to see what you what you’ve read and what you do to challenge your your own thinking and I’ll read every one of your texts. Okay, good. I’ll send was in pictures. And I’m also interested to hear how you know, business flows. How relationships systems improve. I mean, gosh, I think it’s gonna be it’s gonna be wonderful, y’all.

It’ll be it’ll be fine. I’ll just sit on the perch and cry for the first half a day. You know, I don’t know what is going on with me today. But I’ve been scratching this eye. The entire podcast. It just really itches.

Do you think you have a scratched lens? Or a detached retina?

I hope it’s not. Well, I’m not laughing at that. Oh, detached retina would be funny. Better not have any of the paid a lot of money for these eyes? Yeah, you know, cuz you had the surgery, didn’t you? Yeah, they reformed my stuff, whatever that means. Right. But the leisure? Yeah, yeah. LASIK? No. AASA. I don’t know what that means. I don’t either. But apparently the Air Force pilots have it’s like they shoot a bunch of laser beams in your eyes and like, reform your cornea later, you can fly. Yeah, so I’ll be able to fly F 16. And, you know, actually, jokes aside, thank you to our men and women in uniform and the military. Yes. You know, yes, absolutely don’t want to ever. I walked up to a man on Saturday sitting at the bar of this restaurant that we were at it was called corking Cleaver, which was actually really good. The menu was on the cleaver thing. I don’t know. I don’t it didn’t feel Cheney. It felt very, like very homey. And, you know, you could tell this guy was very invested in his restaurant. So I don’t know. However, I walked up to a man he had an army hat on and you could tell he’s probably Vietnam. And I said thank you for your service goes Oh, son, did you serve too? And I said, No, I’m just grateful for you and His eyes lit up like holy ground. You know, you have you have respect and reference.

You know, I thought two things recently one I saw and hispanic man wearing a disabled American veteran hat. And I felt so sad that here this this gentleman is who is of Latina ethnic background, Latino ethnic background and wearing a disabled American veteran hat and then you know, probably fears you know, being pulled over because the color of his skin or whatever, like I really that worried me. And then the other thing that I thought was it’s gonna come back to me, did you?

Did you just have a Nathan moment? It’s

when somebody said recently and it really hit me. When you say, you know, thank you for Oh, It’s in this new show called the village that just started. I don’t know what network it’s on, but I watched it on Hulu. We joined I watched the first episode. And this man comes back from Afghanistan and he sustained an injury, he lost a leg. So he’s on a new prosthetic, he is on crutches. And he comes up to these three older vets in a bar, and they all stand up and salute him. He’s really struggling, like with his identity, and each of them salutes them. Each of them says, you know, I’m Corporal, this Staff Sergeant this and, and they’re making him kind of feel like like, own his, his identity as an American Veteran. And he’s like, I’m just so used to people saying thanks for your service. Like they’re, you know, like they’re ordering a drink at a drive thru.

So is it bad that I said that to him? And I looked at him? No, no, it

just generated in me a reminder, like, what you did is is a beautiful thing. And that’s something that that’s the only time that has happened to that man, probably, if not ever than at least in a long time. Yeah. So I think it does take these people by surprise. And I know that when you get imagining that when you say it, you say it with gusto. Absolutely. And I think that’s really important that we kind of take into consideration when we speak, that we have all the emotional robustness behind what we’re saying that we can muster. That really kind of fills out the meaning of what it is we’re trying to say. No. So but I think that’s lovely.

I just feel that there’s a lot of change happening in the air right now. You know, talking about the codependence topic that we’ve just discussed was something that was on my mind, just because I think I’m witnessing it a lot. I don’t. I could be I could be codependent on things or people. I haven’t acknowledged it within myself. So I’m not gonna sit here and figure that out this this episode, but just a lot of stuff is changing. You know?

Do you interpret your context, your immediate daily surroundings to be imbued with some negativity?

Some, some meaning very minimal. Yes. Probably. Okay. Not as not a lot. What first? You know, if you date back to whenever I first started in business, tons everywhere, it was just like, every breath I took it was like smoking a cigarette of negativity.

Because people around you hadn’t bought in.

No one bought in and then just a bunch of grumpy old man. And most people have most Yeah, most everyone’s bought in. And that feels good.

How do you wish to address the negativity when you experience it? What needs to be said Do you think I think

we heard I think you dress a dress negativity with positivity. I don’t think you live on a cloud of rainbows and unicorns, I always go to that. I was just it’s just perfect. You ever seen the movie? The Last Unicorn? I think I’m talking about this too. Maybe Maybe I’m just dreaming. Maybe everything that I’m saying. Maybe I’m in a dream.

There are people who believe that we live in a simulation. Who that’d be weird. I know of someone who thinks that like legit. Yeah. Well, matrix, what?

What was I talking about you rainbows and unicorns, that’s right. Negativity, negativity,

how to address it, how

to address it, here we go. I think that it’s good to speak. I mean, acknowledge it, you know, don’t tiptoe around people or, you know, hey, I’m sorry that you’re there. It’s regrettable. Rather that you’re there. We just don’t We don’t need that. Let’s let’s let’s get over that.

Why do you think people who tend to have a negative valence are received as some others by as being intimidating, intimidating?

I don’t know that answer. I know it’s true, though.

I wonder why we give such power to that. That shadow side of things. Should it? Why aren’t we? Well, I don’t know what the positive opposite of intimidated is. I think maybe admire could be I don’t know, I don’t know. But I do know that people who are negative tend to suck the air out of a room. And I think that people tend to not want to say anything to them about it for fear of lash out. Because those people have created landmines around them and everybody knows to step very carefully. I just stepped now. Just walk normally, I

just walk normally no blows up, it blows totally fine. Don’t affect me. That’s good. You helped me with that. I mean, that’s just you just got to. I mean, there’s way too much. And I’m speaking personally, for those of you listening, I mean, there’s so many people that are reliant on decisions and I can’t be walking around on eggshells. I do I make decisions. I’m very confident in those decisions and the people in which I decided to do the things and you know if you got a problem with it, You can either stay on the boat in the boat on the saddle in the saddle, that’s it. Or you can just go and you know, wait for the train. There’s so many different

so much going over

so much going on right now you could be in a boat, you could be in a saddle, you could be on on a train.

I like mixing metaphors. Yeah. It’s fun to make like a tree and all buttons. Yeah. Is there something in the next 30 days? To which you are looking forward?

Absolutely. Like any minute now, actually. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Like just watching for an email to come through. So

still nothing yet. Waiting. We’re waiting for the call. Yes. Two calls. Okay. This is exciting.

Yeah. You know, there’s a show. There’s a show that came out in 2012. I think it’s on Amazon right now streaming. It’s the men who built America or the men who made America I don’t know. But if I was like Vanderbilt, and Rockefeller and Carnegie and all these people Pee Wee Herman. No, not him. He didn’t build he. No, he did not. He tore down a door. He tore down. Rockefeller who actually this book scaling up that I keep referring to that I’m pointing to right now, actually has the Rockefeller habits the dude was brilliant. So at 25, he had taken a refinery, he realized that kerosene which was helping with like lanterns and building and creating light and then in the dark, and he knew how to refine it, so that it was pure so that it didn’t have such dangerous effects. He went from struggling at 25 to a multimillionaire, which was actually at that time, billions worth billions by 33. That’s the age that I am now. He was a devout Christian man. However, he was a ruthless Get out of my way. And it just inspired me, huh, inspired me. He did not he did not care. Like if you are not on his team, then everyone was out to get him. And he knew it. And he wasn’t fearful of it. He just went and he just attacked you were

either for him or against him. You were against him. You were in the sights.

100% he would go and you buy refineries up spy on and then shut them down. Wow. Because there were competition to him. He went to the railroad. He went to Vanderbilt and he started putting his kerosene on the on the cars. Well, then he wanted less money. Yeah, a per per car and Vanderbilt because Vanderbilt owned over 40% of the railways. Okay. It’s incredible what he did. Rockefeller went to Vanderbilt competitor, put all of his kerosene on his cars. Well, then, Rockefeller got it on there for less so then the two railroad competitors had to get together to even survive. Rockefeller said, You know what? The heck with you guys. And he built a pipeline system. Totally cutting out the railroad middleman. Yeah. Yep. actually shut one of those businesses down because of

it. This is like the Walmart business model where Walmart went to two Vlasic Pickles. I think it was classic. That’s the one that says, pickles, make your smile like a bird. Yeah. And they went to the classic pickle company. And they said, we need you know, a jug. I don’t know if that’s a gallon or whatever. I’m holding my hands like a big pickle jar. I need this much. And we need it for this much. And they’re like, Okay, we can do that. And so they sign a contract with them. At the end of the contract. They’re like, okay, great. So you know what, speaking of codependency lassic ended up having so much dependency on that Walmart contract, Walmart knew that Walmart came to them and said, Okay, now we need to make this same amount. And we need to do it for like half the price. And they’re like, like, we literally cannot do it for that. And they said, Sorry, it’s that or nothing. There’s no more Vlasic Pickles. They’re gone. So ate him up. Come in, make a contract, work the deal. Create dependency, cut the price kills them.

Rockefeller was doing verbal agreements. Oh, shaking hands. He was like, he was like, Oh, get the contract worked out. This was obviously a reenactment. And he said no need a handshake is fine.

Wow. And did that serve him? Well served him well. Yeah. And it just not so much anymore? He’s deceased. No, I mean, that that idea? Oh, wait, well, he’s dead too. But the idea that the handshake is literally, but also think, you know, it’d be nice it would be but it is also

nice to continue to honor your word. Because if that’s your word, you have nothing. You know, your word is good as gold, all that stuff. And I think in business that’s super important. I just am really inspired right now. And for those of you who are really business minded and love business, I think you can be calm, a very good business person, but you have to have something that’s already in you. Yeah, you know, and I feel that I’m I’m a good businessman and I have but anyway, for those of you who are that’s a whole other podcast. But if you’re interested, please watch that. Because it’s like I was in bed last night watching this and I could not sleep.

And let me ask, is it all men?

That were that were on this? Is it literally?

Is it one episode or is it a series? It’s a serious man that bill, it’s

the men it this following men. But you know, these are in the late 1800s, early 1900s, Henry Ford and haven’t gotten to that episode yet. However, this is whenever women were probably not listened to and expected to be at home carrying, you know,

though, that Yeah, think about what we missed, and how far we might would have come by now.

I think we’re catching up because of it, though. Now,

I don’t know. I don’t know that we ever will. It’s kind of like the Atlanta, interstate infrastructure. They built Spaghetti Junction to 8585 2075. All right. They’re in downtown Atlanta. And it was obsolete the day they started it. That’s how fast growth was happening. And I kind of feel like I don’t think that will ever catch up. Because of the damage done. Yeah. Well,

nonetheless, that the inspiration for for me in regards to that is very exciting. And I think we can apply that in the world that we’re in.

So the book scaling up does. I’m trying to course my way through a book, I mentioned it once before, and I put it down to read something I got for Christmas, and I’m wanting to pick it back up after that called the $1 million, one person business. So I haven’t read enough to be able to speak with any degree of intelligence or cogency on it. But do you think that scaling up speaks to businesses of all kinds?

Yes. For all kinds of businesses that want to not settle? So like 85, or something nuts, 87%, something crazy, less than 20% of American businesses exceed $1 million in revenue annually. That’s crazy. Yeah. And only like, less than 5% exceed 100 million. So my point is there’s, there’s so much out there for the taking.

Yeah, there’s money on the table. Yeah. So what is our what’s the genre that our podcast is categorized?

No people?

I don’t either, because I was asked that. And I said, I really don’t know. Like, I thought it was business. But if it is life, its lifestyle. Right? That’s what I didn’t know. I don’t know the answer to the question. And I don’t know how we find that out other than look it up on anchor.fm or slash you’re trying?

Or you’re trying.com or facebook.com forward slash feel that or you’re

trying podcasts on Instagram, or you’re trying podcasts@gmail.com. Other than that, I don’t know where we would find. Yeah,

I don’t know if maybe if they those of you listening would leave a five star review on your listening device. Maybe then we would know maybe we would definitely know by then. Yeah. Or if you had a text message, the link to listen to this episode or more.

Or if you saw a link pop up on your social media site and you liked it or shared it or I think we would probably find out then too. Yeah. So there are a lot of ways that y’all could help us find out who we are.

Because we’re codependent.

My name is Jonathan. I’m

Nathan. I’m going to issue

this. Yeah, I’ll miss you too. But we will be back before we know it. Doing what we do and doing what we do best. Until then. This is

the old die trying